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DEDICATED TO STARRK—BECAUSE EVERYONE LOVES A BADASS HIPPY!


Scene 1: Introducing...

Starrk: *wakes up suddenly with a loud snort* Oh shit, what's going on?

Ulquiorra: *randomly appearing in a pink dress with fairy wings and a wand* It's your turn to do a parody. We decided to do one in your dream world, so you won't fall asleep again, because you already are. I'm here to make sure things start rolling, or else they wouldn't at all. *Huge sigh* I'm... your fairy godmother...*under his breath* I'm going to kill Gin for this...

Starrk: *processing*...Oh...*still processing* Oh! Hey, not cool, man, I thought the others were gonna theirs first!

Ulquiorra: They were, but then they decided it would be much more fun to let you get pwned first.
And also the author just wanted to get you over and done with. In her mind: I = 'awesome'. You, on the other hand  = '...Meh, not so much.'

Starrk:..'Meh'?

Ulquiorra: Yup.

Starrk: *yawns* Aww...can't this wait?

Ulquiorra: No.

Starrk: Please?

Ulquiorra: *brandishes wand* I'll cut you.

Starrk: Whoa, whoa, easy there Fairy Emo Dude...Wait a sec, what the hell?

Ulquiorra: What's the problem now?

Starrk: Why're you wearing a dress? The wings and wand I don't mind so much tho. Stylish.

Ulquiorra: You know that sugar you stirred with your tea last night?

Starrk: Uh...yeah?

Ulquiorra: It was crack.

Starrk: Oh. Dang, that's one hell of a drug.

Ulquiorra: *smacks him with the wand* No one steals my catchphrase.

Starrk: Wtf, since when?

Ulquiorra: Since I first used it in the Dodgems Incident.

Starrk: Dude, firstly—you used it ONCE—and second—THAT WAS, LIKE, FIVE MONTHS AGO—AND YOU NEVER ONCE USED IT AGAIN!

Ulquiorra:...You're point?

Starrk: To hell with this, I'm goin' to bed...*lays down and begins to snore*

Ulquiorra: No you don't! Hey! I'll...I'll...I'll take away your porn stash!

Starrk: *mumbling* I don't have a porn stash...

Ulquiorra: What are you talking about? Every Espada has a porn stash!

Starrk: Including you?

Ulquiorra: Ye—NO!

Starrk: Lol, gotcha. It's UlquiGrimm yaoi, isn't it?

Ulquiorra:  SHUT UP!! Damnit!...Ok, um...I'll...I'll put Lillynette up for adoption!

Starrk: Sure, go ahead, the kid's f*cked if she stays in this nuthouse any longer.

Ulquiorra: What?! Right, you leave me no choice...If you don't get off your crack-inhaling ass, I'll...I'll take away Mr. Pinky the teddy!!

Starrk: *shoots up like a bullet and grabs Ulquiorra round the ankles* NOOOO, NOT MR. PINKY!! HE DRIVES ALL THE BEDROOM MONSTERS AWAY!!

Ulquiorra: *smiles smugly* So you'll do the parody?

Staark: Yes!! Anything you want—just don't take him away!!

Ulquiorra: Good, now get to it.

*Suddenly, Aizen pops up on a screen nearby*

Aizen: HAI GUYS!!!

Ulquiorra: *groans* Oh no...Gin fed you the crack candy again, didn't he?

Aizen: PONIES!!!

Ulquiorra: I'll take that as a 'yes'.

Aizen: OMG GUES WHAT! THE PARODY'S OVER NOW—NEXT PAIR'S UP!! WEE!!

Ulquiorra: Wait, WHAT?! But we haven't even started!

Aizen: TOO BAD! *twirls* NEXT IS YOU AND GRIMMY-KINS!

Ulquiorra:...'Grimmy-kins'?

Aizen: YUP! MY ADORABLE FLUFFY BED-MUNCHKIN!! HE'S SO CUTE, I JUST WANT TO PET HIS LITTLE BOTTOM AND SQUEEZE HIS CHEEKS!!

Staark: O.O;;...Laters, I'm gonna wake up...and go be sick somewhere...

*he vanishes, leaving Ulquiorra and Aizen in Staark's dream space*

Ulquiorra: *smirking* Heh...I'm so glad my left eye has wireless connection to SS News and Hueco Mundo TV...I'm gonna make a fortune from this madness...

Aizen: *throwing petals and crack in the air around him* WHAT WAS THAT EMO-KINS?

Ulquiorra: *stares innocently* Oh, nothing sir...Absolutely nothing...

*chuckling evilly, Ulquiorra exits Staark's dream space with what little male dignity he has left despite wearing a pair of fairy wings, pink frock, and holding a potentially-lethal magic wand*


TO BE CONTINUED XD
The Espada (c) and Aizen (c) belong to Tite Kubo

Admittedly, this is probably one of the least funny parodies I've done...but I can't think of much to do with Staark ^^;

Ulqui's gonna be in every Parody dedicated to individual Espada, by the way. He just makes things more fun XD
Add a Comment:
 
:iconsynysterdemonicrose:
SynysterDemonicRose Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I love Starrk! :iconbigheartplz:
Reply
:iconcollettey:
Collettey Featured By Owner May 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
oh my gawd...
THIS WAS HILARIOUS!
I really like the part where Starrk was begging Ulqui not to destroy his teddy bear. :beg:
Reply
:iconxxkimi-sanxx:
XxKimi-SanxX Featured By Owner Dec 18, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
"Starrk: *shoots up like a bullet and grabs Ulquiorra round the ankles* NOOOO, NOT MR. PINKY!! HE DRIVES ALL THE BEDROOM MONSTERS AWAY!!"
Reply
:iconnightmarekittykat:
NightMareKittyKat Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
O.o should i be scared? lolz nice job on this!
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2011  Student Writer
Thank you! :D
Reply
:iconnightmarekittykat:
NightMareKittyKat Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
yer welcome :)
Reply
:iconburnt-rose-pedals:
Burnt-Rose-Pedals Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Ulquiorra: I'll cut you! XD PONIES!!!
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2011  Student Writer
XD
Reply
:iconmaia61:
Maia61 Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2011
i want a wand
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2011  Student Writer
LOL XD
Reply
:iconmaia61:
Maia61 Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2011
lol gotta love it when aizen randomly yells PONIES!!:lmao: aaand emo-kins, grimmy-kins, whats next? ginny-kins ... lol i want an emo-kins:squee:
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2011  Student Writer
Lol, glad to hear it! :D
Reply
:iconmaia61:
Maia61 Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2011
hehehe emokins gets to sleep in my bed *wink wink*
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2011  Student Writer
LOL

Ulquiorra: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

XD
Reply
:iconmaia61:
Maia61 Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2011
Mwahahahahaha :giggle: HUGZ TA ULQUI!!
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2011  Student Writer
ULQUI HUG FEST!!! :dance:

Ulquiorra: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconblack-richa:
Black-Richa Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011
He is #1 after all, if he says he's not gonna do it, hey, it's not gonna happen - of course he got saved :lmao: :rofl:
and he's also the only one without a porn stash!! :icononionxdplz:
I love how he was unfazed by Ulquiorra's threats, including the the Lilynette one :pointandlaugh: well... until he brought up the teddy :iconnelsonplz:

Ah... it is one hell of a drug :icongreatjobplz:
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2011  Student Writer
HAIL CRACK!! XD
Reply
:iconblack-richa:
Black-Richa Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2011
ALL HAIL!!
:worship:
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011  Student Writer
:lmao: XD
Reply
:iconblack-richa:
Black-Richa Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011
:icononionx3plz:
Reply
:iconanimegoddess411:
animegoddess411 Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011  Student General Artist
haha, Ulqui chuckled
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
I know--it's a miricle!! O.O
Reply
:iconanimegoddess411:
animegoddess411 Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2011  Student General Artist
No. Not a miracle. The Apocalypse has now fallen upon us.
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2011  Student Writer
:lmao: Yeah...XD
Reply
:iconanimegoddess411:
animegoddess411 Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2011  Student General Artist
lol
Reply
:iconakatspada1:
akatspada1 Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011
no, this was very funny XD
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
Aw, thank you! :hug:
Reply
:iconkujafangirl2:
kujafangirl2 Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
:lol:
Kari: Yush, crack is one helluva drug. :iconlawooplz:
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
:lmao: XD
Reply
:iconkujafangirl2:
kujafangirl2 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
Haku: -_- Nnoitra, you better get her to rehab again.
Kari: NOOOO!
Nnoitra: I'M GETTIN' FED UP O' THIS SHIT, KARI!!! :rage:
Kari: :iconbegplz:
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
Nnoitra: I AIN'T HAVIN' IT, COME ON! *grabs her and drags her to rehab*
Reply
:iconkujafangirl2:
kujafangirl2 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
*Weeks later*
Kari: -_-...
Nnoitra: Well, say summat.
Kari: -_-...
Nnoitra: <.\\
Kari: ...
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
Nnoitra: Shit, what did they do?
Reply
:iconkujafangirl2:
kujafangirl2 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
Kari: ...didn't like it. Coulda stopped whenever I wanted to... <.<
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
Nnoitra: ...Right. Sure ya could.
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconxxxchibixkittyxxx:
xXxchibixkittyxXx Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011
LOL Mr.pinky and fairy Emo dude XD
....wait a second
FAIRY EMO DUDE?:iconwantplz:
lolz i love this 8D
-----
:iconulquiorraplz::iconsaysplz:oh,my reputation ._.;
:iconstarrkplz::iconsaysplz:since when did you have reputation?
:icongrimmjowlolplz::iconsaysplz:LOL owned!
:iconulquiorraplz::iconsaysplz:not funny <.<;
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
Thank you! :love: Grimmjow's up next!
Reply
:iconxxxchibixkittyxxx:
xXxchibixkittyxXx Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011
yw:dummy:LOLYAYZ!Grimmy:icontobiseizureplz:

:iconxxxchibixkittyxxx::iconsaysplz:run grimmjow run XD
:icongrimmjowwtfplz::iconsaysplz:lolwut o-o?
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
:lmao: XD
Reply
:iconsenbonzakura77:
Senbonzakura77 Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAH omg!!!!!! lolly xD
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
:D Thank you!
Reply
:iconsenbonzakura77:
Senbonzakura77 Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
No problem :D
Reply
:iconveertje-feather:
veertje-feather Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconmonkeylaughplz:
I like emo-fairy-princess Ulqui :dummy:
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2011  Student Writer
Yes...terrifying, isn't it? XD
Reply
:iconmagnolia-belle:
Magnolia-Belle Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2011
bahahaahahaaa!!!!!! that was the funniest of yours ive ever read!!! oh im tear-abled now!! :D :rofl: :lmao:
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011  Student Writer
Thank you! :heart:
Reply
:iconichini2546:
IchiNi2546 Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2011
lololol yes! I was soooo waiting for a Starrk one man! just made my night thanks a bunch! xD
Reply
:iconfrostysnowman94:
frostysnowman94 Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011  Student Writer
Aww, glad to hear it! :hug: No probs!
Reply
:iconichini2546:
IchiNi2546 Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2011
yesh x3
Reply
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